A life of Commitment

Time is an extraordinary thing. At times it seems elastic. Going too quickly or too slowly. Moments arriving too early or too late. We always think that we have more time, but there is never enough time, to spend with those we really love.

When Andrew, Helen and Catherine became housemates in Cambridge, they were only together for 10 months before Helen left to get married, and yet that time seemed so much more. Those few months made them lifelong friends. Real friends. Sharing each other’s highs and lows. Becoming each other’s haven and support.

Andrew was born in Cambridge to Teddy and Rosemary, a hugely musical family. His sister, Racheal, followed soon after. With both parents musicians and a grandmother who taught music to the royal family, Andrew’s life was destined to be surrounded by music.

Andrew himself was born a gifted musician, with perfect pitch, a lyrical singing voice and unique sensitivity when playing Classical music.

It is fitting that music has been so much of the service today. Reflecting the diversity of Andrew’s musical taste as a singer, pianist, drummer and guitarist.

It was however his perfect ear that began his career. Training first as a piano tuner, with fellow student, Alison Mayeaux. While his sister became a member of a Pop band, Andrew became guitarist in a Punk band. Both siblings entering the Pop charts in the late 1970s.

Andrew married young, perhaps too young, as he actually ended up marrying Lizzie twice. Never conventional, he took her name, becoming Andrew O’H and together they had five children: Emerald, Rose-Bud, Shaun-Patrick, Robin and Beth.

While Shaun-Patrick is carrying on the musical tradition, Emerald is now an actress. All the children leading different lives across the globe.

Andrew loved being a father, adored his children and their creative, chaotic home was full of love and music.

Just don’t ask him to mop the kitchen floor!

Dependability, a gentle strength. These are the qualities that Helen remembers of her friend. She helped him move house. He looked after her when she was getting divorced. His home was her refuge.

Andrew was however completely impractical and chaotic. This did not impact his career. Instead, when Helen was offered an MA at Angelea Ruskin, which she could not attend, it was Andrew (who had failed to apply) that took her place and was accepted on a MA in Music Therapy. A profession which completely suited his hippy lifestyle.

Andrew had always been Lizzie’s carer. When a spouse becomes ill, a decision has to be made: Whether to look after them no matter what. This is even harder when the illness is addiction. Andrew did everything he could to give Lizzie the best life possible.

The news of Lizzie’s tragic death, in a motorcycle accident, was painful to all who knew her, but especially her family. How do you explain to your children that their mother is never coming home?

After her death it became even more important that the family home be a sanctuary. The same sort of happy, life fulfilling place that the house share had been so many years ago. The sort of place Helen will always remember.

Helen had been with her family, in Devon, when she knew she needed to get back to Cambridge to see Andrew.

He had been ill for some time. His hospital visits were more frequent, and he tried alternative medicine to help with the symptoms. However, the Cancer remained.

As Helen travelled home that evening, everything slowed down. Time slowed down.

The traffic was bad. She rang the hospital to say she would like to visit but she was delayed. They said it was okay to come anyway. She arrived at 10pm but they still let her in. She should have realised then, but she just wanted to see her friend.

When she got to his bedside, she was not the only visitor. It was late.

And so it was, that a few hours later, Andrew died. Watched over by those who loved him.

Cambridge was always Andrew’s home, his whole life, and now he will be laid to rest here, in the way his family wanted. Returning his gentle spirit to nature.

We will now play “Ange” by the Rolling Stones ….